PERSONAL PRESENTATION
One of the things that can irritate an already upset person is your personal presentation. If they feel that your grooming and dress are unprofessional or inappropriate, they're more likely to hassle you.
Some areas of personal presentation, if not seen to, might have a negative influence on an upset person. Check to make sure that your:
- Hair is clean, brushed or combed, and well kept.
- Clothing is pressed, neat, clean, and in good repair.
- Breath is fresh.
- Hands and fingernails are clean, with no chipped polish.
- Face is shaved, or mustache/beard is neatly trimmed.
- Makeup is applied neatly, moderately, and appropriately.
- Stockings are run-free.
We all make initial assessments of others based mainly on personal presentation. According to some experts, we make decisions about people within the first four seconds of our meeting them. Says Bay Alexander, President of Professional Impact (Santa Cruz, CA):
“If you're in a position where you're likely to interact with angry customers, you have a chance to use your image as one of your more effective tools to signal your power, control, knowledge, and composure. If you're dressed inappropriately or too casually for your position and business, customers are more likely to push to get their way, and call for a higher authority if they don't like your response.”
You might have experienced the power of your appearance when you are a customer. Have you noticed how much easier it is to return an item to a store when you're neatly dressed than when you wear torn jeans and a dirty tee shirt? You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION
Here are some ways that your body language and voice tone might affect an upset person:
Facial Expression. When people complain, do you ever roll your eyes, scowl, or have an inappropriate smile? Be aware of your facial expression when you communicate.
Ask friends, coworkers, and your supervisor whether you have facial expressions that could be annoying, especially to upset customers. Keep a calm, concerned, sincere, and interested facial expression that shows the customer you care. Some people smile when they're tense, but you don't want to smile while a customer is expressing anger. If you do, the customer might feel that you're not taking them seriously.
Body Posture. Do you tend to loll or slouch at your workstation? Show that you're attentive to your customer by standing and sitting up straight. When you loll or slouch, you might seem inattentive or disinterested. Maintain a nonthreatening, open body posture. Stand far enough away to give the customer room; crowding them might increase their irritation.
Movement. Upset customers want to see you respond to their needs speedily. This doesn't mean you have to sprint to help, but don't mosey, either.
Gestures. Do you stand or sit with your arms crossed? Do you hold your head up with your hands? The most common interpretation of the arms-crossed gesture is that the person is closed and unwilling to listen. When communicating with an upset customer, uncross your arms to show that you're listening and have an open mind.
Smoking. Don't smoke in front of customers, even if your employer allows you to smoke in your work area. Put that cigarette out, even if your customer is smoking.
Chewing Gum or Eating. Don't chew gum or eat when you're on the phone or in the public eye. Even if your employer allows it, these acts can be annoying and can escalate an upset customer into an irate one.
Touching. Avoid touching an upset person, especially if they appear potentially violent. This could set off violence.
Voice Tone. Do you sound annoyed? Does your voice go up at the end of a statement? You project your attitude through your voice as well as your body language.
Remember, helping customers is your job. If you can't stand to help upset people, get transferred to another job. Make sure your attitude is always “I'm here to help as best I can.” People respond more to how you say something than to what you say. When your voice is annoyed, impatient, or condescending, the customer will become angrier.
When your voice sounds confident, they'll believe you know what you're talking about and it will be easier to calm them. When your voice goes up at the end of a sentence, it sounds as if you're asking a question. Listen to yourself in a tape recorder; if your voice goes up at the end, practice keeping an even tone, or one that ends on a lower note. You'll sound confident and competent. Speak with a calm, firm, caring, soothing tone.
Sighing. Sighing often suggests annoyance or impatience. Don't sigh in front of an upset customer.
Cursing. Even if the customer curses, there's
never an excuse for you to curse. No matter how many insults they shout at you, remember that you're a professional.
Compose yourself as best you can, and avoid responding to abuse. It's a sign of strength, not weakness, to stay calm and respond with patience when someone is cursing and insulting you.
WORDS THAT MAKE A DIFFERENCE
The words that you use with customers can help communications — or they can start a fight. Here are some common Fight Starters and suggestions on replacing them with Communication Helpers.
Keep It Impersonal
Fight Starter: “You didn't do this right.”
Communication Helper: “There are a few areas on this form that we need to complete.”
If the customer did something wrong, point out the mistake indirectly. They will often be embarrassed at their mistake, get angry because of this embarrassment, and try to blame you. Avoid sarcastic, blaming, or condescending statements. Even if the customer is wrong, the time to make it known is
notduring a rage.
Use ‘I' Instead of ‘You'
Fight Starter: “You're wrong.”
Communication Helper: “I can see there's been a miscommunication (or misunderstanding).”
Fight Starter: “You're confusing me.”
Communication Helper: “I'm confused.”
Don't blame the customer. When explaining what went wrong, use either the indirect approach or “I” statements as much as possible.
Avoid Giving Orders
Fight Starter: “You have to ... “
Communication Helper: “Will you please … ?”
Fight Starter: “It would be best if you ... “
Communication Helper: “It might be best if we ... “
People don't like to be given no choice. Ask them pleasantly to do something or explain how it will be to their benefit. People don't like to be given orders. Rephrase your statement more politely as a question.
Fight Starter: “You should have done ... ”
Communication Helper: “We want your next visit to go as smoothly as possible. This will assist you.”
Fight Starter: “Wait here.”
Communication Helper: “Would you mind waiting while I speak to my supervisor?”
When people hear “should,” they often think of their parents or some other authority figure telling them what they did wrong. Instead of telling them what they should've done last time, tell them what will be helpful for next time. The past is past and there's nothing anyone can do about it. Focus on the future — the next time — instead.
Take Responsibility
Fight Starter: “I can't ... ”
Communication Helper: “I don't have the authority. However, Mary should be able to help you. Let me get her.” If you can't help, connect the customer with someone who can.
Fight Starter: “It's not my job.”
Communication Helper: “Let me see what I can do to help. John is the specialist in that area. Let me get him for you.”
Even if what the customer needs isn't within your job responsibility, instead of telling them this, tell them how you can help.
Avoid Causing Defensiveness
If people think they're being criticized, they'll react defensively — that is, angrily.
Fight Starter: “You never do it right.”
Communication Helper: “This is often not done correctly.”
Fight Starter: “You're always late.”
Communication Helper: “This payment is often late.” Always” and “never” sound critical and uncompromising; use “often” instead
.
Fight Starter: “You filled this out okay, but ... ”
Communication Helper: “You filled this out well, and ... ”
People don't listen to what you say before the “but.” They concentrate on what follows. Use “and” instead, so they'll listen to the whole sentence.
Fight Starter: “It will cost you ... ”
Communication Helper: “The rate is ... ”
“Cost” sounds negative, and costs can imply time, aggravation, and other things in addition to money.
Fight Starter: “What's your problem?”
Communication Helper: “Please tell me what happened.”
People don't like to have problems, and they don't like others to know they have problems. Use the inquiry instead. There's plenty to work with here. Practice even with customers who aren't upset. Also, engage a co-worker or your supervisor in helping you become aware of any habits you have that might make a customer more upset. Then work on eliminating these annoyances.
This article is reproduced, with permission, from the VuPoint Newsletter
of the IIABA Virtual University. Rebecca L. Morgan, CSP, CMC, is a professional speaker and seminarist. She is the author of four books, TurboTime: Maximizing Your Results Through Technology, Calming Upset Customers, Life's Lessons: Insights and Information for a Richer Life,
and Professional Selling.
For information on her speaking services, books, and tapes, contact her at 1440 Newport Ave., San Jose, CA 95125, (408) 998-7977, (800) 247-9662, fax (408) 998-1742, e-mail [email protected], or Web site www.RebeccaMorgan.comThe goal of the CompleteMarkets editor is to bring valuable content to the CompleteMarkets members. Providing content to insurance professionals to enhance their sales process, increase revenue streams, understand their clients and provide value to their agency.