CRACKING THE EGG: DEALING WITH DIFFICULT CUSTOMERS
by Dave Kahle
It’s easy to work with people you like, and it’s even easier to work with people who like you. But that’s not always the case. Sooner or later, you’ll have to deal with a difficult customer. Dave Kahle describes a process called 'Cracking the Egg' that you can use to deal with difficult customers.
Difficult customers come in a wide variety. Certain personalities will rub you the wrong way. They might not be difficult for someone else, but they are for you. And then there are those who are difficult for everyone: Picky people, know-it-alls, egocentrics, fault-finders, constant complainers, etc. Every salesperson can list a number of the types.
But perhaps the most difficult for everyone is the angry customer — someone who feels that they’ve been wronged, and gets upset and emotional about it. These customers complain because they’re angry about something you or your company did.
There are some sound business reasons to become adept in handling an angry customer. Research indicates that customers who complain are likely to continue doing business with your company if they feel that they were treated properly. It’s estimated that as many as 90% of customers who perceive themselves as having been wronged never complain — they just take their business elsewhere. So, angry, complaining customers care enough to talk to you, and haven’t yet decided to take their business to the competition. They’re customers worth saving.
Learning how to handle angry customers also offers personal benefits. You’ll feel far more confident in your own abilities. If you can handle these people, you can deal with anything. Although anyone can work with easy people, it takes a real professional to be successful with difficult customers. Your confidence will grow, your poise will increase, and your self-esteem will intensify.
On the other hand, if you mishandle it, you’ll watch the situation dissolve into lost business and upset people. You might find yourself upset for days. How do you handle an angry, complaining customer? Let’s begin with a couple of tools you can use in these situations.
1. RESPECT
It can be difficult to respect a person who might be yelling, swearing, or behaving like a two-year-old. I’m not suggesting you respect the behavior, only that you respect the person. Keep in mind that 99 times out of 100 you’re not the object of the customer’s anger. You’re like a small tree in the path of a swirling tornado. But unlike the small tree, you have the power to withstand the wind.
What’s the source of your power? Unlike the customer, you’re not angry, you’re in control, and your only problem at the moment is helping them solve the problem. If you step out of this position and start reacting to the customer in an emotional way, you’ll lose control, you’ll lose your power, and the situation will probably escalate into a lose-lose for everyone. So, begin with a mindset that says, 'No matter what, I will respect the customer.'
2. EMPATHY
Put yourself in the customer’s shoes, and try to see the situation from their perspective. Don’t try and cut them off or urge them to calm down. Instead, listen carefully. If someone’s angry or upset, it’s because the person feels injured in some way. Your job is to let the customer vent and to listen attentively in order to understand the source of their frustration. When you do that, you send a powerful unspoken message that you care about the customer’s situation.
Often, as the customer comes to realize that you really do care and that you’re going to try and to help resolve the problem, they’ll calm down on their own, and begin to interact with you in a positive way.
Here’s how you can use these two tools in an easily remembered process for dealing with angry customers.
CRACK THE EGG
Image that you have a hard-boiled egg. The rich yellow yolk at the center represents the solution to the customer’s problem, the hardened white that surrounds the yolk represents the details of the customer’s situation, and the hard shell represents their anger.
To get to the yolk and resolve the situation, you must first crack the shell. In other words, you need to penetrate the customer’s anger. Then you’ve got to cut through the congealed egg white. That means that you must understand the details of the customer’s situation. Finally, you’ll reach the heart of the situation, where you can offer a solution to the customer’s problem.
So, handling an angry customer is like cutting through a hard-boiled egg. Here’s a four-step process to help.
1. LISTEN
Let’s say you stop to see one of your regular customers. They don’t even give you time to finish your greeting before launching into a tirade.
At this point, about all you can do is listen. And that’s what you do. Don’t try and cut them off or urge them to calm down. Instead, listen carefully. And as you listen, begin to piece together the story. For example, the customer ordered a piece of equipment three weeks ago. You quoted X price and delivery by last Friday for a project that’s starting this week. Not only is the equipment not there, but the customer received an invoice at a different price than was quoted.
'What kind of shoddy operation is this?' they want to know. 'Do you understand how important the project is? Do you know how much time and money is at stake? If the customer doesn’t get their equipment and something happens to this project, you’re going to pay for it.' The customer just knew they should have ordered the equipment from your competitor. What are you going do about it?
Now you have the basic story. After this gush of frustration, there’ll be a pause while the customer comes up for air.
More often than not, once the customer has had an initial chance to vent their rage, it’s going to die down a little, giving you an opportunity to step in.
Even if the customer has started calming down on his own, there comes a moment — and I can almost guarantee you’ll sense it — to help calm them down. Say something like: 'It sounds like something has gone wrong, and I can understand your frustration. I’m sorry you’re experiencing this problem. Let’s take a look at the next step.'
Try to calm yourself first, and then to acknowledge the customer’s feelings. Say, 'I can tell you’re upset...' or, 'It sounds like you’re angry...' then connect to the customer by apologizing, or empathizing. Saying something like 'I’m sorry that happened. If I were you, I’d be frustrated, too,' can have an amazingly calming effect.
Remember, anger is a natural, self-defense reaction to a perceived wrong. If there’s a problem with your company’s product or service, some frustration and disappointment is justified.
To repeat, first listen carefully and completely to the customer. Then empathize with what the customer is feeling, and let them know that you understand. This will almost always calm the customer down. You’ve cracked the shell of the egg. Now, you can proceed to deal with the problem.
2. IDENTIFY THE PROBLEM
Sometimes while the angry customer is venting, you’ll be able to latch right on to the problem because it’s clear-cut. Something is broken. Or late. Or the customer thinks a promise has been broken.
But sometimes in the middle of all that rage, it’s tough to comprehend the bottom-line issue. This is a good place for some specific questions. Ask the customer to give you some details. 'What day did you order it, when exactly was it promised. What’s your situation at the moment?' These kinds of questions force the customer to think about facts instead of their feelings about those facts. Interjecting a more rational kind of conversation should help cut through the white of the egg to get to the yolk at the center.
Once you think you understand the details it’s important to restate the problem. You might say, 'Let me see if I have this right. You were promised delivery last Friday, because you need it for an important project this coming week. But you haven’t received our product yet. Is that correct?'
The customer will probably acknowledge that you’ve sized up the situation correctly. Or, they might say, 'No, that’s not right' and then proceed to explain further. In either case, the outcome is positive because you’ll eventually understand the customer’s situation correctly, and they’ll tell you 'Yes, that’s right.'
At that point you should apologize. Some people believe that an apology is an acknowledgment of wrongdoing. But you can appreciate and apologize for the customer’s inconvenience without pointing fingers. Just say, 'I’m sorry this has happened.' Or, I understand this must be very frustrating. Let’s just see what we can do fix it, OK?'
3. AVOID BLAME
You don’t want to blame the customer by saying something like 'Are you sure you understood the price and delivery date correctly?' This will just ignite their anger all over again because you’re questioning their credibility and truth telling.
And you don’t want to blame your company or your suppliers. Never say, 'I’m not surprised your invoice was wrong. It’s been happening a lot.' Or, 'Yes, our back orders are way behind.'
In general, avoid blame! This is different than acknowledging responsibility. For example, if you know that a mistake has been made, acknowledge the fact and apologize for it. 'Clearly there’s a problem here with our performance. I can’t change that, but let me see what I can do to help you out because I understand how important your project is.'
4. RESOLVE THE PROBLEM
Now you’re at the heart of the egg. You won’t always be able to fix the problem perfectly. And you might need more time than a single phone call. But it’s critical to leave the irate customer with the understanding that your goal is to resolve the problem. You might need to say, 'I’m going to need to make some phone calls.' If you do, give the customer an idea of when you’ll get back to him: 'Later this afternoon.' Or 'First thing in the morning.'
Then do it. Make the phone calls. Get the information. Find out what you can do for this customer and do it. Then follow up with the customer when you said you would. Even if you don’t have all the information you need, call when you said you would and at least let the customer know what you’ve done, what you’re working on, and what your next step will be. Let them know that they and their business are important to you, that you understand their frustration, and that you’re working hard to get things fixed.
Combine the tools of respect and empathy, with the 'crack the egg' process, and you’ll move your professionalism up a notch.